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Do you overthink after you sent out an email?

When in doubt ask and follow up

I clicked ‘Send’ and then…

I waited.

I worried.

I questioned it.

I wanted to go back and unsend it.

I doubt it.

I regretted it.

I blamed it.

I experienced shame.

I checked my emails several times a day…

In most cases, I would get a response but on some emails, days would pass with no response.

And I thought I missed something. I made up stories when in reality there was no way I would be able to guess what really happened.

This was until I was coached one time on this topic.

What I realized is that the only person that knows what happened is the recipient.

No matter how creative I would get, I would never be able to guess what happened.

Now my mindset is:

“When in doubt, ask the recipient.”

When I didn’t get an answer I started to follow up and the majority of times I got an answer and often it was not what I had imagined.

Most people thanked me for following up and took the action necessary and I would reach the goal of my email.

Yes, some never answered, but that was very rare, and that was ok as well.

I’ve realized that following up is professional. Most people appreciate it because at times they got busy and couldn’t get back to me right away.

A follow-up can help someone stop procrastinating and take an action they would enjoy.

I took this approach and generalized it to other areas. For example:

– When I sense that a friend is acting differently, I would ask if we’re ok.

– When I coach, if I’m not sure we’re moving in the right direction, I would simply ask my client if we’re on track.

– If I don’t know something, instead of pretending I know, I would ask for clarification.

Was it hard?

Only for a couple of times. Once my brain saw that I survived and I’m ok, it became super easy to follow up and ask.

Now I rarely do any overthinking before I follow up.

What I want to leave you with is that:

1. Following up is professional and healthy for you and the other person.


2. When in doubt ask the person that has the answer.

What are you doubting today? What can change if you ask or follow up?

To follow up is professional and when in doubt, ASK

For additional details or to schedule a complimentary session to understand how to NOT DOUBT YOURSELF and lead a more balanced, happier and fulfilled life, please email me at



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